‘I’ll Have What She’s Having.’ What It’s Like Filming a Fake Orgasm Movie Scene With Your Mom, According to Rob Reiner

It’s a famous story. Back in 1989 when Nora Ephron and Rob Reiner were coming up with When Harry Met Sally, Meg Ryan swapped some of the tight writing to move the scene about faking orgasms to a diner. She also suggested she fake an orgasm publicly, which was not in the script. Rob Reiner then cast his already-famous mom Estelle in the scene, and she ended up with one of the most iconic lines in the movie, and in rom-com history as a whole. But filming an orgasm scene in front of your mom is not for the faint of heart.

Rob Reiner recently appeared on 60 Minutes as part of the press run he’s been doing for Spinal Tap 2, but forget exploding drummers, because what I was really interested in was the story about his mom and how it impacted one of the best rom-coms of all time. Luckily, CBS’ Lesley Stahl had to ask him about the famous scene from the room-com starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal. While the scene ultimately became iconic, it was more than a little awkward filming it in front of cameras and other people.

First couple of times, [Meg] didn’t do it full out. And finally I sat across from Billy. And I acted it out for her. I said, ‘This is what [I need]. And I’m pounding the table, ‘Yes! Yes! Yes!’ And I’m realizing I’m having an orgasm in front of my mother, you know? There’s my mother over there.

making the “orgasm” scene so easy to film. Sounds like it may have been easier for the actors than the director…

The Boys’ Jack Quaid, who had to confront the fact their mom was responsible for one of the most famous “orgasm” scenes ever in their own childhoods. Eventually, Quaid watched When Harry Met Sally when he signed on for a rom-com in Hollywood himself, but it was a long path to get there.

Still, It Was Rob Reiner’s Own Idea To Sign On His Mom

Meanwhile, Katz’s Deli is still a popular establishment, and Billy Crystal himself went a couple of years ago on When Harry Met Sally’s anniversary. It was Crystal who ultimately wrote the “I’ll have what she’s having” line while they all collaborated on the scene, as Nora Ephron revealed in an interview years ago. Then, as the ideas continued flowing, Ephron remembered Rob Reiner suggested his mom.

He said of the epiphany moment:

I said to her, ‘You know mom the line you have is the last line in the scene, and if it doesn’t top everything that has gone before it, I won’t use it. I mean, we’ll shoot it but be prepared that if it doesn’t get the laugh that tops the rest of the scene it might have to be cut.’ She said, ‘I don’t care. I just want to spend the day with you and be with you on the set. I don’t care if it’s in the movie or not.’ It turns out, it did top the rest of the scene.

Giving your mom the gift of an iconic movie line is priceless, but it sounds like what Estelle Reiner really cared about was the day with her son. I love that both things worked out exactly as they were intended.

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